Downhill

Have you ever felt like your life is just going downhill and all you want is to be happy? You feel like you’re doing your best yet it shows up to be wrong or bad. I have had a hell of turbulence week and yet I don’t even know why I keep trying. I have had people saying I should kill myself, I should drop out of university and so on. I have had the people who’s always been there to supported me turned their back on me, I have basically had to learn have to stand alone and deal with everything alone. And you know what hurts? When I finally have that one person who is willing to do anything for me, but as the person I am I have always had to deal stuff on my own so when their is drama going on or me being bullied I tend to just push that person away because that’s what I used to do before I went silent because no one wanted to hear what was going on, if I did they didn’t believe me, so instead of keeping that person close to me I choose to distant myself from that person because I think that’s the best thing to do. When I have been for so many years have to learn to stand by myself it’s not easy to change that. Another that’s gonna forever be stuck in my mind Is why do people hate me without ever talking to me, just been seeing me on social media and there they go sending me message that I’m a horrible person.

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