Forgive yourself

Everyone has gone through some kind of pain. Example “Emma” was raped by her neighbor when she was a teen she later told me that it was horrible and she had it happen to her twice but she had one comment from both of those events which was “it has had an impact on the rest of my life. I can never forgive them for what they did to me”

Then there was “Ally” who was physically and mentally abused by her parents for years, she lived in a small town where everybody in that town knew about what happened to her but no one had the guts to tell police or child support about what was happening to little “Ally” she told me this “ it’s not just my parents I can’t forgive, what  about everyone else that knew and had specious about what happened but didn’t open their mouths, I feel like my life is ruined and I can’t go back to that town ever”

Everyone is going through some kind of pain as we can see that “Emma” and “Ally” and those two have gone through some horrific experiences. Other kind of hurt sometimes seem insignificant. Yet most of us have been hurt in a big or a small ways. And sometimes it’s not about whether or not to forgive the other person, but whether or how to forgive yourself.

Perhaps a friend has betrayed you by sharing you told her/him in confidence with someone else. Or maybe you found out that your girlfriend cheated on you after she kept telling you she would never ever cheat on you. Or a friend let you take the blame for something he/she did. A teacher gave you an unfair grade on your exam that you’ve worked so hard on, or a friend that simple just hurt your feelings.

The list is long and I could have written so many more examples, just so I could write yours up.

But you can choose between never forgive the person who did you wrong or you can forgive yourself, by that I mean do not think it’s your fault! Don’t blame yourself that your boyfriend cheated on you because you think you weren’t good enough for him! Don’t blame yourself for the wrong that the person did. It’s not your fault. You did nothing wrong. You aren’t the bad person. If your boyfriend cheated on you then just tell yourself “he have lost a girl who wouldn’t have left him.” Be the strong on and don’t let the people who have done you wrong win! Don’t let them take over your future! Don’t let one pain ruin the happy things in your life.

I just want to say thank you to those who shared their stories with me. It’s not their real names since I’m not putting out their stories online.

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